Whats Up There?

 The last few nights I have been awoken from dreams but i take umbridge at being awoken from my rather nice dream last night when it was just getting interesting! I awake to loud and varied noises coming from above me in the attack.
 My friend next door thinks it is a walrus or some sort of clog dancing variety of rat. I am now curious and preparing to either make peace with or do battle with whatever is up there. I am also curious now as to why the loft hatch is so securely screwed shut! If I start hearing moaning and bells then i will have to get intouch with a certain cathedral on the continent because whilst I have nothing against hunchbacks I dont particularly want an infestation of them in my attic.
So I shall peer over the parapet and risk having my facial mask torn off by a rabid loft-dwelling hyena type creature. I did contemplate throwing my jamoffee up there in the hope that whatever is dwelling there will get stuck to it but after second thought i considered this to be a cruel way to die. Starvation due to having ones mouth glued shut with jamoffee would not be pleasant...not to mention the tooth decay.
Wish me luck as I adventure into the Attic.